Paradise Reel

Dragon Tiger Gate (Long Hu Men)

Synopsis: Set in a fictional version of Hong Kong, Tiger Wong (Nicholas Tse) fights for injustice and the righteous way. He has however a step brother on the other side of the law whom incurs the wrath of the Lousha gang and enlists the help of Dragon Tiger Gate to aid in his quest to defeat evil.

Alright, this review has been terribly overdue but here it is nevertheless. Had a project to complete and did up a couple of articles for future posting. Thanks for hanging around.

There comes a film every now and then that just begs to be critiqued. To be ripped apart, analysed and compared to every other shred of literature pertaining to the film in question. And here comes Wilson Yip’s attempt to adapt this popular Hong Kong comic to the big screen that portrays itself as the perfect candidate for the task. After being ‘coerced’ (actually I wanted to catch it so that I’d get the bitching rights) into watching this film with a bunch of friends, I feel it in my civic duty to make public the film’s true intentions.

The storyline is so convoluted that I contemplated not even writing a synopsis for this review. But for the benefit of all you dear readers out there, I have forced pen to paper and jotted down that blurb above. Apparently the film is basically a “two brothers, each on the other side of the law” kind of story. It is a story of redemption but a weak one at that. The characters are flat as a Keira Knightly’s chestitular area and there is hardly any character development to speak of. I would strongly suggest to the marketing executives to include a 500 page comic (both in English and Chinese) explaining their backstory with the purchase of every ticket. At least that way, we can feel like we came away from the movie with SOMETHING.

Someone should honestly question the sanity of the films’ hair stylist as he/she just decided to weave each of the main characters a Beatles hairdo. Opting for a retro look I’ll bet, they equipped the two main characters will floppy cuticles that obscures half their face at any given time. The kicker was a poignant scene where Dragon Wong (Donnie Yen) was delivering some crucial dialogue looking like Cousin Itt from the “Adam’s Family”. With makeup styling at its best, how can this film not make a killing at the box office?

This film just takes all the cliches known to man and crams them into a 90 minute movie. Which could have turned out to be a good thing but they just took themselves too seriously. I’m pretty sure there are some people out there (the two ladies sitting next to me in the theater for instance) who have a deep rooted emotional investment in the characters, probably developed from all those lonely Friday nights reading the comics from cover to cover. And these people are probably the ones who will find some semblance of a plot to this train wreck of a movie (and probably dress up as their favourite character for their weekend cosplay festival).

If this is the kind of films that Hong Kong chooses to produce nowadays, it will be short notice before they close shop their once booming film industry. With Korea rising up to overtake the Asian film arena by storm and Hollywood now setting its grubby paws on Asian cinema, Hong Kong will be hard pressed to develop projects of a higher filmic standard than what they are used to. Just stay away from this film unless you have a burning desire in your loins to see three less than hunky males cavorting aimlessly in tank tops and tight jeans.

After months of deliberation, the powers that be (namely Microsoft and Peter Jackson) have decided upon a director for the upcoming “Halo” movie. It is none other than Neill Blomkamp. Who is the hell is this bloke?? Apparently, this relatively unknown director is best known for his work on a commercial titled “Alive with Technology” for Citroen. Any one out there have the videoclip of this or perhaps seen it?*

For those not in the loop, “Halo” was/is a massively popular video game that enthralled unparalleled legions of fans all across the globe. The game tells the story of a certain “cybernectically enhanced soldier of the future” fighting off a horde of alien species hellbent on ridding the world of humans (Sound rather trite no?). As a video game, this was an awesome premise but I’m not too sure how well this will translate onto film. The game took a lot of its cues from Hollywood land (ie. “Aliens”; “Black Hawk Down” and more war movies that you could swing a film cannister at) and now they want to return to that medium in which spawned the game? “Halo” was hardly original in its concepts or ideas (what is nowadays anyway?) but it was a very addictive package to PLAY as a video game. And there has not been ANY notable video game to film adaptations that has proved its worth to their core audiences (save for “Silent Hill”).

Faced with the numerous rewrites, a new untested director, and with the fact that the Halo universe is basically a mish mash of the best in sci-fi films, I honestly think this movie is going to be a mess. I PRAY that they will prove me wrong come opening day because it would be a terrible waste of a good franchise.

*Update to post: The “Alive with Technology” commercial that Neil Blomkamp was responsible for is the transforming Citroen car in some deserted parking lot. After watching the commercial, you’d think that he would be more suited to direct the upcoming “Transformer” movie rather than this sci-fi space romp.

The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift

Synopsis: Sean Boswell (Lucas Black) is your typical American teenager who rebels against social norm and buck authority. To avoid a jail sentence, he is sent to Japan to live with his father and there discovers the world of underground (ie. illegal) drift racing.

To be honest, I went into the theater with bottom of the barrel expectations of the third installment of the “Fast and the Furious” franchise. I lauded the first one and would not have caught the second one if it were not the only thing on cable at that god-forsaken hour in the morning. Now here we have American born Korean Justin Lin’s (“Better luck Tomorrow”) first Hollywood effort, “The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift”. Although it does not raise the bar in terms of storytelling or plot, it definitely does showcase the best chase car sequences of any of the other films in the series.

The story is basically your typical redemption story line. A young white American nobody travels to a foreign land, inflict his culture onto the unsuspecting natives and becomes a god amongst insects. This is kind of the main gist of what “The Last Samurai” tried to do and failed. But we did not really come to this film to fuss over the plot did we? At the bottom line, we bought our ticket for one of two things, the first, to oogle at some of the most beautiful things on 4 wheels. The second, the edge of your seatbelt race car sequences with said beautiful things on 4 wheels. This film is a car enthusiast wet dream, and they filmmakers exploit it so.

This movie will probably not go too well with American audiences than the Asian ones as this form of street racing is intrinsic to our region. ‘Drifiting’ is a driving technique that many professional racers employ to make high speed turns while racing. That technique has been used heavily by the street racers on the mountain roads of Japan. This film is a very romanticized version of the Japanese street racing culture as you will find some aspects of the film highly improbable. With that said, one also has to note that most of the drift races in the movie were accomplished without the use of computer generated imagery. What you see on screen is the real deal which is something that the first two films failed to preserve.

No one is going to win an Oscar for their acting capabilities here. Lucas Black (“The War” and “Jarhead”) plays the run-of-the-mill Yankee troublemaker, Sean Boswell, with gusto. Nathalie Kelley is the half Japanese/half something else love interest who gets Sean into spots of trouble with all the wrong people. I must admit though, everyone in the film certainly looks the part they play. The film is basically a lineup of stereotypes, it has everyone from the rich dumb American jock to the wise but reserved Asian mentor. You will, however, quickly forget about it because of all the pretty girls that populate the film and the even prettier cars. Word of revelation to those females who are coerce into watching said film with their respective boyfriends, the guys are only drooling at the CARS.

This film will definitely draw comparison to the recent “Initial D” movie by Andrew Lau and Alan Mak (the team behind the insanely famous “Infernal Affairs”). In terms of pure adrenalin rushes, I felt that this film exceeds that of what the recent “Initial D” film tried to do. Justin Lin keeps the action fresh by introducing new angles and tight camera shots that bring you right into the passenger seat. This film is highly recommended to all you Initial D fanatics out there and anyone who has a car fetish. Just check your brain at the ticket counter and enjoy the ride. There are a bunch of “Initial D” references throughout the film which is a nice touch as that was probably what propelled drifting’s popularity throughout Asia and the rest of the world. Also be on the lookout for a certain Toyota Corolla ’86 hiding in the background during one of the races. Blink and you will miss it.

The rumour mongers have been stoking the fires of gossip as to who will play the iconic role of the Joker in the upcoming sequel to the excellent “Batman Begins”. As of today, Warner Bros. has annouced that it is none other than Heath Ledger who will slide into those purple pants as the ultimate Clown Prince of Crime. Frankly, I am slightly taken aback by this decision to go with Ledger as this would be quite a departure from his previous roles (ie. the desirable hunk in “Casanova”, “A Knights Tale” and most recently, “Brokeback Mountain”). Heath would probably have to shed a chunk of his hunkiness to fit Joker’s scrawny frame. So what is the concensus guys? Who were your choices for the purpled master of mayhem?

Another piece of Batman news is that the title for the sequel has been locked down and its simply titled “The Dark Knight”. Pretty cool eh? The two Chris’s (Nolan and Bale) will have to be back as I cannot imagine the sequel without them. Sir Michael Caine and Morgan Freeman will reprise their roles as Alfred and Lucious Foxx respectively. A rumoured new addition to the cast will be Phillip Seymour Hoffman who should be playing the Penguin. And hopefully we’ll get to see more of Gary Oldman as Lieutenant Gordon too.