Paradise Reel

Snakes on a Plane

Synopsis: It is a movie about snakes on a plane. Do you need me to say anything else?

This is probably the only movie I know that is just worth the ticket price for that one line of dialogue coming out of Sam Jackson’s mouth (“Enough! I’ve had it with these M*therF*ckin’ snakes on the M*therf*ckin’ plane!” just keeps playing over and over in my head). “Snakes on a Plane” is just so bad that is falls off the scale and pops up at the other end of the spectrum. It is campy, and the plot is rather ludicrous but frankly scarlett, I don’t give a damn. This film is the every bit of the B-grade movie it claims to be and best of all, it never takes itself seriously.

Sam Jackson is back in familiar territory as the butt kicking, foul mouthed, hard arse that we have been waiting for him to play again (RE: “Pulp Fiction”, “S.W.A.T.” and “The Negotiator”). I honestly think that the 3 Star Wars Prequels would have been bloody awesome if ol’Georgie had just let Mr. Jackson belt some expletives throughout the trilogy. “Enough! I’ve had it with these M*therF*ckin’ Sith in my M*therf*ckin’ Jedi meditation chamber!”

Of course, a movie this enjoyable has to have some things wrong with it. It is just the Murphy’s Law of movie making. For starters, there are plot holes so huge that you could drive a tractor trailer through. But we don’t care. The acting is as campy as having the Village People do their stage rendition of “Brokeback Mountain”. But we don’t care. The computer generated snakes look about as real as that rubbery thing in your younger sibling’s toy chest. And we don’t really care about that either. We are here for the mindless violence (which is pretty much as non existent as Singapore’s culture) and the gratuitious nudity (and that is only limited to one scene…hey, I want my money back!)

The only shortcoming that I can forsee for this film is that it is a fanboy’s film. It is not a movie that everyone will enjoy, especially those who actually took the film “Long Hu Men” seriously. This film was made for fans of this genre and pretty much them only. It is a niche movie that you gather all your male friends and organise a movie outing for. I would expect this film to be inducted into all the fraternities across the United States’ Movie Hall of Fame. For further fratanizing enjoyment, try this game during the film. Every time you see a snake on screen, drink a can of beer. By the middle of the film, you will be so plastered silly that you’ll enjoy the film anyway.

I believe the writer (or writers, this film had 4) of the film sat down one day on his toilet bowl and wondered “how many interesting places on the human body can a snake bite?” and then he went about to write the script for “Snakes on a Plane”. There is a significant amount of bodily mutilations throughout the movie, both reptile and human alike. And of course your token topless scene. The most creative aspect of the movie has got to be the title. “Snakes on a Plane”, how brilliant is THAT?? You know exactly what you’re going to get right from the start. There are no ambiguous subliminal titling like “Lost in Translation” or “The Cider House Rules”. This film is as forthcoming as Hollywood is going to get. The film is about SNAKES-ON-A-PLANE. And it delivers.

I guess I have to touch upon the acting at some point of the review and why not now. Basically this film is like a class at acting school playing a host of stereotypes on steroids. Cliches are abound and aplenty. You have the fat black guy who is really good at video games, the ditzy blonde whose best friend is her canine companion, the slutty stewardess, the horny pilot, the asian martial artist, the guy who has the fear of flying. They are all there and the list goes on. This film is just fun to watch with your buddies and friends of the female gender seem to have enjoyed the film too (the one that went with us anyway). So, if you’re high after a night of clubbing and have nothing to do, make your way to some midnight movie theater and catch this film. This movie is fun when you’re sober and even better if you’re drunk.